The Little One Still Weeps: Understanding Childhood Trauma in Adulthood

Behind many of the adults we meet—those who appear strong, capable, and put together—live stories of childhood pain that were never fully spoken, heard, or healed. Trauma experienced in childhood doesn't simply disappear as we grow older. It follows us. It may change its face, but its fingerprints remain—on our relationships, our decisions, our bodies, and even our faith.

This week, as part of our Trauma Awareness Month blog series, we’re peeling back the layers of childhood trauma—what it is, how it shows up in adulthood, and how we can support the healing journey for ourselves and those we love.

What Is Childhood Trauma?

Childhood trauma refers to distressing experiences that happen during the formative years of life—typically before the age of 18. These experiences overwhelm a child’s ability to cope and leave lasting imprints on the mind, body, and spirit. The trauma may come from abuse (physical, emotional, sexual), neglect, abandonment, witnessing domestic violence, losing a loved one, or growing up in an environment of addiction, instability, or emotional absence.

The younger a child is when the trauma occurs, the more profound the impact, because they lack the language and developmental tools to process what’s happening. And when the pain goes unacknowledged or unvalidated, the child learns to cope in silence.

As adults, we often forget that what we survived wasn't always safe. We normalize the pain or minimize it—"it wasn’t that bad," we say. But our nervous systems remember. Our relationships remember. And our inner child—the version of us that never got to heal—remembers.

"Even if my father and mother abandon me, the Lord will hold me close." — Psalm 27:10 (NLT)

How Childhood Trauma Shows Up in Adulthood

Many adults don't immediately connect their current struggles to their childhood experiences. They may battle with anxiety, depression, anger issues, people-pleasing, codependency, or chronic self-doubt, never realizing these are often trauma responses in disguise.

Here are a few ways childhood trauma may resurface later in life:

• Fear of abandonment: Even minor disagreements or distance in relationships can feel like rejection.

• Difficulty trusting others: When those who were supposed to protect us caused harm, it becomes hard to believe anyone is safe.

• Perfectionism and overachievement: For some, being perfect was how they earned love or avoided punishment.

• Emotional numbness: Shutting down emotionally becomes a defense mechanism against overwhelming pain.

• Chronic guilt or shame: Children often internalize trauma as their fault, and that belief carries into adulthood.

And spiritually, many trauma survivors struggle to view God as loving or trustworthy. If their early caregivers were abusive, absent, or unsafe, it often colors how they relate to authority figures—including God. This disconnect can feel deeply isolating in faith communities that expect joy, trust, or healing without understanding the layers of hurt beneath the surface.

Supporting the Healing Journey

Healing from childhood trauma is not about “getting over it.” It’s about learning how to make peace with what happened, honoring the resilience it took to survive, and creating safety—internally and externally—for yourself.

Whether you're on this journey personally, or walking beside someone who is, here are a few foundational steps toward healing:

1. Acknowledge the Pain Without Judgment

Too many survivors have learned to silence their pain, believing it was “too small” to matter or “too long ago” to still hurt. But pain that is dismissed only festers in the dark. Acknowledging trauma doesn’t mean reliving every detail—it means honoring the truth of what happened without minimizing it. It is the holy act of saying, "This mattered. I mattered." And when someone else gives you space to voice your story without fixing or dismissing, they help chip away at the shame trauma tries to cement in us.

2. Reconnect With the Inner Child

Inside every adult who experienced childhood trauma is a younger version of themselves who still longs to be seen, protected, and loved. Reconnecting with your inner child means intentionally nurturing that part of you. It may look like journaling letters to your younger self, engaging in activities that once brought you joy, or simply pausing to speak words of kindness over yourself. When we reconnect with the child within, we validate their experience and offer them the safety they never received—and in doing so, we begin to rewire the way we relate to ourselves.

3. Pursue Trauma-Informed Counseling

You don’t have to heal alone. Trauma-informed therapy creates a space where your story can unfold at a safe pace, guided by someone trained to understand the effects of trauma on the body, brain, and spirit. A Christian counselor can also integrate spiritual truth and prayer into the process—helping you not only process your pain, but re-anchor your identity in God's love.

At Faith on the Journey, our Christian counselors specialize in walking alongside survivors with grace, compassion, and clinical wisdom. You deserve that kind of care.

4. Lean Into Safe Relationships

The very thing that wounded us—relationships—can also become the soil where we heal. Trust may feel risky, and vulnerability uncomfortable, but healing can’t happen in isolation. It’s in spaces of safety—where you are free to be seen, believed, and not judged—that new narratives are written. Cultivating healthy boundaries, finding emotionally safe friends, and engaging in small groups or trauma-support communities can give you the connection your heart has longed for.

5. Invite God Into the Process

God is not distant from your pain—He was there when it happened, and He’s still here now. Healing from trauma doesn’t require you to have perfect faith. It simply requires you to say, “Lord, come into this with me.” When you invite God into your wounds, you give Him permission to begin transforming them into testimony. As Psalm 34:18 reminds us, “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” There is no timeline in God’s grace. No expiration date on healing. His love is patient, present, and powerful.

Conclusion: Healing the Child, Freeing the Adult

Childhood trauma doesn’t get smaller with time—it gets buried deeper. But the good news is this: what was broken can be healed. What was silenced can be voiced. And the child who still weeps inside you can finally be held—with tenderness, with truth, and with hope.

This is Week 2 of our Trauma Awareness Month series. Stay with us as we continue this journey next week, uncovering how trauma shows up in professional life—and what it looks like to create healing even in the workplace.

Because when the wounds speak, we listen—and healing begins.