Pastoral Care vs. Counseling and When to Refer for Christian Counseling

Pastors carry so much of the emotional and spiritual weight in their communities. When someone is hurting, they call you. When tragedy strikes, they expect you to know what to say. When a member is struggling with grief, trauma, or something unspoken, you show up with prayer and presence. But at some point, you may begin to wonder, how much of this am I truly called to carry?

The truth is, there’s a difference between offering spiritual support and providing professional counseling. And discerning when to transition from one to the other isn’t just wise, it’s loving.

Let’s look at how pastoral care and counseling work together in ministry, and how to know when to refer someone for deeper support.

What Is Pastoral Care?

Pastoral care is the ministry of presence. It’s being there during hospital visits, praying with those who are grieving, walking with someone through marital struggles, or offering encouragement during a crisis. It’s rooted in biblical guidance, prayer, and support, but it may not always address the deeper mental health challenges that require professional care

Pastoral care helps people feel seen, known, and loved by both their spiritual leader and by God. It reminds them that they are not walking alone.

“Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.” – Galatians 6:2 (NIV)

This kind of care is deeply impactful—but it's also limited in scope. It’s not meant to replace the specialized work of a professionally trained Christian counselor.

How Pastoral Care Differs from Counseling

Christian counseling addresses emotional and psychological wounds at a clinical level. A counselor is trained to work with individuals who have experienced trauma, abuse, addiction, suicidal ideation, and a host of other mental health concerns.

While pastoral care supports spiritual growth and healing, Christian counseling goes deeper into the areas that require clinical insight. It uses therapeutic models aligned with Scripture to guide someone toward wholeness.

The difference isn’t about value, it’s about role. Pastors are not meant to carry every burden alone. And referring someone to a counselor doesn’t mean you’ve failed. It means you care enough to get them the specific help they need.

Signs It’s Time to Refer for Christian Counseling

You may already be offering deep support to someone in your congregation, but how do you know when it’s time to refer?

Here are some clear indicators that a referral may be the most loving next step:

• They’re stuck in a cycle of pain that doesn’t seem to lift.Despite your prayers, support, and encouragement, they continue to revisit the same emotional wounds without progress. You sense they’re spinning in circles, and the issue may be rooted in deeper trauma that needs therapeutic tools to heal.

• You feel overwhelmed or unsure how to help.There’s no shame in hitting a wall. If their story leaves you anxious, emotionally burdened, or constantly second-guessing your responses, it’s a sign the situation requires more than spiritual counsel. It needs clinical care.

• They’ve shared experiences of abuse, violence, or suicidal thoughts.These are sacred moments that require professional intervention. While you can pray and be present, these disclosures point to trauma that must be handled by a skilled professional Christian counselor who is trained to walk with them safely.

• Spiritual guidance isn’t moving the needle.You’ve prayed together, pointed them to Scripture, and provided accountability—yet they’re still struggling to function or find peace. This signals that healing may require uncovering and processing emotional wounds you’re not equipped to treat.

• You’re emotionally drained by the weight of their needs.If your energy is depleting and you feel spiritually or emotionally taxed after each conversation, that’s not failure—it’s wisdom knocking. God didn’t ask you to carry it all. A referral allows you to continue pastoring them while someone else helps carry the deeper emotional load.

  
  

This is where the power of partnership comes in. Christian counselors and pastors can work together to offer holistic care. A counselor addresses the psychological wounds; you continue offering community, discipleship, and spiritual covering.

Establish relationships with counselors who share your biblical worldview so that when it’s time to refer, you know exactly where to send your people.

You’re Not Called to Carry It All Alone

Even Moses needed help. When he was trying to manage every need in Israel, his father-in-law Jethro gave him this wisdom:

“What you are doing is not good… You will only wear yourself out. The work is too heavy for you; you cannot handle it alone.” – Exodus 18:17–18 (NIV)

The same applies to you. God never intended for you to carry every burden in your church or ministry alone.

When you refer someone to a trusted counselor, you are still pastoring them—you’re just doing it wisely. You’re creating space for real healing while also preserving your own emotional and spiritual well-being as a leader.

Let go of the pressure to be everything. Focus on what God has actually called you to do: shepherd, not solve.

Provide Spiritual and Mental Health Resources

A healthy church doesn’t only pray for healing—it makes healing accessible. Normalize conversations around mental health from the pulpit. Encourage staff and volunteers to explore trauma-informed care. Introduce your congregation to counseling options. Host healing groups. Invite a licensed therapist to speak to your leadership team.

Let your community see that seeking help isn’t a weakness—it’s wisdom.

“He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.” – Psalm 147:3 (NIV)

This is where transformation happens—when the church and clinical care work together. And if you’re not sure where to begin, we’d love to walk with you.  Faith on the Journey partners with churches to connect them with trusted, skilled professional Christian counselors who specialize in supporting those who are grieving and healing from trauma.  Learn more about our services by visiting faithonthejourney.org/counseling and scheduling an informational session with our team.